Column first published in Madame Noire
By Christelyn Karazin
Thereâ€™s a lot of spitting and cussing about wll.i.amâ€™sÂ comments during anÂ Elle magazine interview about how â€œtackyâ€ it is for single women to have condoms in their homes.
I mean, really.Â Itâ€™sÂ soooo tacky to have some forethought and desire to preserve oneâ€™s health.
But I guess itâ€™s not â€œtackyâ€ that 73% of black children are born out-of-wedlock, many of whom were conceived because some black woman also believed it was tawdry to protect her vagina just in case her and her date got caught up in the heat of the moment.Â And how crude of her to not want to be vulnerable to the high incidence of STD and HIV transmission within the black community?Â Who the heck does she think she is, a white girl?
â€œHis attitude is exactly that judgmental and condemning attitude that black men have about black womenâ€™s sexuality. Â It puts black women in a box and makes the woman have to pretend to be something sheâ€™s not in order to meet the approval and acquire the affection of a man,â€ says Deborrah Cooper, relationship expert, radio personality and operator ofÂ SurvivngDating.com.
The sad truth is that young black women are force-fed this bull-donkey in church, and well-meaning family members that â€˜good girlsâ€™ donâ€™t buy condoms. Â And when you get knocked up because there were no condoms in the side table, you can say it â€œjust happened.â€
The performer said this in his interview: â€œI just think, like, if youâ€™re into someone and you guys get to that level, then thatâ€™s something you should converse about together and say, â€œHey, maybe we should get some.â€
Huh.Â Okay; so youâ€™re hot and heavy with a guy, clothes are off, and certain body parts areâ€¦uhâ€¦activated, and you expect people to stop getting down to have some type of DISCUSSION?