Black In the Bay State â€“ Fly, Fabulous and Fed up
Changing the black perspective one entry at a time
Myth â€“ Your husband will beat you. Your kid is better off.
Fact â€“ If you pick a good husband in the first place, you donâ€™t have to worry about that. Damaged men who put their hands on women should be alone or in jail. There are warning signs! He doesnâ€™t come home and randomly punch you one day. He works his way up to that.
Myth â€“ Fatherless (black) kids can become president.
Fact â€“ Obama had a â€˜dadâ€™: his grandfather. Being raised by his grandparents gave him a two-parent home even if they were not his biological parents.
Myth â€“ We hate black men (hahaha my favorite!)
Fact â€“ Telling people to do what theyâ€™re supposed to do is not â€œhatingâ€ them.Â You implying that itâ€™s inconvenient for them to take responsibility, is saying that you have little faith in their abilities to be adults. Maybe I should ask if YOU hate them and why you donâ€™t think much of them.
Myth â€“ Youâ€™re just bitter cause you want kids.
Fact â€“ Any idiot can breed. Having kids is not an accomplishment; raising them correctly is the real accomplishment. Iâ€™m bitter because â€œbaby mamaâ€ has become synonymous to blackness.
Myth â€“ You are not offering any solutions.
Fact â€“ We tell you every day: â€œChose quality men.â€ Thatâ€™s a start. Quality man = Quality husband = Quality father. AKA he wontâ€™ beat your ass AKA he wonâ€™t drop his kids like hot potatoes.
Myth â€“ Youâ€™re classist.
Fact â€“ MaybeÂ you should be more selective. Not everyone can have a six-figure salary, but we should try to stack the odds in our kidsâ€™ favor.
Myth â€“ â€œMy kids have everything they want.â€
Fact â€“ Your kid is 5, you donâ€™t know that. Youâ€™d be surprised to find out what they really wanted as kids once they turn 20. They donâ€™t care about the child support check that your baby daddy is beingÂ forced to cough up. Maybe they just wanted to sit on their dadâ€™s lap at the family barbecue like the other kids could.
Myth â€“ Her husband is overseas.
Fact â€“ (Try not to let this crash course in statistics blow your mind) With 70% of black kids being OOW, odds are, the only sea her (non) husband is over, is across the pond dodging his responsibilities.
Myth â€“ Itâ€™s not your business.
Fact â€“ If Iâ€™m doing her baby daddyâ€™s job (my taxes paying forÂ WIC instead of him taking her grocery shopping) it becomes my business.
Myth â€“ Itâ€™s not your business
Fact â€“ If her choices put her kid at a higher risk of becoming a criminal, because he develop all the issues that often accompany fatherless children, then it becomes my problem because I have to live in society with him.